Remembering Who Your Day is Really About

Image by Brandy J Photography

Being in the wedding industry, I've seen a lot of reasons why couple's choose not to do something, "It's out of our price range" or "That's not my style", but when I hear, "My mom doesn't like it" or "Daddy's footing the bill" as an excuse it always makes me sad.  Truly, madly, deeply sad.  Your wedding, whether to your high school sweetheart or a person you've known for just three months, whether a man to a woman or a man to another man, should always reflect you and who you are as a couple.  End of story.  Understandably, the person wielding the check book always gets a say, but I so, so, so wish that person would realize who the wedding day is all about - YOU, the actual person getting married!

Recently, I met with a bride for a design consultation and she proceed to tell me price would ultimately decide what kind of stationery she would get because her father felt price was the only decision-making criteria and he was paying for everything.  I was obviously taken aback by this. . .but when she continued to say that a certain shade of blue is and has always been her favorite color and that she was only allowed to incorporate accents of it because her mother hated it, I was crushed.  She proceeded to say, "My mother says this is her wedding because her own mother planned hers. . . she says I'll be the same when I have a daughter."  I wanted to cry for her (and for her future daughter for that matter).

It's things like this that perpetuate the cycle of weddings not being about the couple, but instead about the parents and it has to stop - let it stop with you.  If you want to get married in a wet suite at the local aquarium, but wouldn't think of it because your nanna wants you to have a traditional church wedding - do it anyway!  Nanna will be happy when she sees how happy you are :o)  Do whatever it is that your heart desires because you only get one chance (and remember it's not ok to hijack your children's weddings just because you didn't get to have your wedding your own way).  You have one chance as bride and groom or bride and bride to walk down that aisle knowing every guest left knowing you a little bit more.  As kindly as possible, tell the haters that it's not their day, it's yours and enjoy every single minute of your beautiful, unique and oh-so-you event (and then send us pictures!!)!!   And if your parents decide to close their check books, then so be it.  Take the money you do have and make each and every penny count towards making your wedding day ALL about you ;o)