Since my sister is getting married I took the liberty of buying literally every worthwhile wedding magazine available at both Target and Borders. While flipping through The Knot Ohio, I found what is quite possibly the best list of "rules" to follow when planning your wedding. I absolutely had to share because a) these are things that every bride should know, but most likely won't be aware of since they're never planned a wedding and b) I reiterated several of them when speaking to my sister just the other day (she's already experienced almost half of the "issues" on the list and she's only been engaged six days)! So, read this, re-read this, share it with your friends and know that it will truly help you avoid stress while planning your big day!
10 Wedding Blunders to Avoid
From blowing your budget on your dress to hiring friends instead of pros, here's a heads up on 10 wedding headaches you can definitely do without.
Written By Meredith Bodgas, Original Article in The Knot Ohio
1. Try not to get attached to your flower choices.
When you book your florist a year before your wedding day, he can only guess which blooms will be available for your wedding. If you have to have, say, asters, you could be disappointed. Instead, choose backups to your main blooms and add them to your contract. Think in terms of colors and shapes instead of specific flowers.
2. Think twice before you send save-the-dates to everyone.
Until you mail out invitations, your guest list isn't final. And it shouldn't be: Friends you're close with when you get engaged may be mere acquaintances by the time you get hitched. Reserve save-the-dates only for those guests you know will be invited, like your families. {I couldn't agree with this more - alway, always, always only send save the dates (and any other pre-wedding announcements/invites) to those people that will always, no matter what, be on your guest list. Start with the bridal party and immediate family members, people that you would never think of not inviting.}
3. You will regret it if you skip videography.
Photos only take you so far: Videos let you hear your voice tremble as you say your vows and watch your friends tear up the dance floor. With more people documenting your wedding, you'll see things you may have missed on the day. {This is honestly something I regret not doing for my own wedding - photography captures so many wonderful moments, but videography can almost make you feel as though you're reliving them.}
4. Be careful not to blow your fashion budget on your dress.
Maybe you have $1,500 set aside for your look. That doesn't mean you can buy a $1,500 gown! Tack on tax, and if you're not buying off the rack, you could get charged for shipping. You might need alterations, too. Consider your undergarments, shoes, hair accessories and jewelry when budgeting as well.
5. Avoid micromanaging your vendors.
You're choosing talented pros who understand your vision, so let them do their jobs! We know it's tempting to control every detail so you're guaranteed to love the results, but you won't have the time, and you certainly don't have the experience your vendors do. After your initial meetings, trust the pros to get it right. And, you know what? They almost always will. {One more piece of advice to add here, if you constantly feel that your vendors aren't doing their job maybe it's a good idea to change them. The last thing you want to keep telling yourself is, "On the actual wedding day they'll come through. Right?" You don't want to wait that long - if you're having issues with a vendor from the beginning, chances are they'll continue and you don't want to have to deal with a major issue the week of, or even worse, the day of your wedding. Always trust your instincts.}
6. Think hard before you pick your attendants.
Your bridesmaids should be your closest friends. Period. They can also be your sisters, cousins, aunts and even your mom, but they have to be people you'd trust to be there when you most need them. You don't know new friends well enough yet to be sure they'll support you in tough situations (every bride encounters one at some point), and picking people because a family member demands it or so you and your man will have an even number of attendants are also decisions you'll likely regret. {This is the first thing I told my sister - give your engagement a bit of time to settle in before you even think about choosing your attendants. See how people react when you tell them and really think, "Would this person be there to help me out when I'm in need?" and "Am I going to be friends with this person ten years down the road?" So many people, myself included, end up not even talking to someone that was in their bridal party, to avoid that think long and hard about why you're choosing people. Never worry about hurting feelings, there are so many other duties friends can do if you don't feel they're close enough to stand up with you on your big day.}
7. Please restrain yourself from telling everyone your plans.
It's so hard not to talk about your wedding. Try. The more you share, the more opinions you're going to get about your choices, whether or not you ask for them. Plus, part of wowing your guests is surprising them. If they already know that you're changing into a different dress for dancing or sending guests home with a batch of your grandma's cookies, they won't be quite as impressed on your wedding day. If that's not enough to deter you, talking about your plans means opening yourself up to copycats, who may actually be marrying before you do. The last thing you want is your friend stealing your idea for your surprise grand finale. {I've seen this time and time again. Friends that are engaged during the same time talking about the details of their big day only to have one say, "Well, I was going to do that. . ." and then feelings get hurt. When in doubt, keep your mouth shut :o) Rely on, "We haven't finalized that part of the wedding yet."}
8. Seriously, stop booking your salon appointments last.
We get it: You want as much beauty sleep as possible, and you don't want your 'do to fall out or your makeup to fade before you walk down the aisle. But guess what: Busy stylists will likely get to you late if you're last in the chair. Schedule your appointments in the middle of your attendants'. It's not a big deal for a bridesmaid to switch to a less complicated (read: quick) hairstyle if she's pressed for time. That's not an option for you.
9. Don't even think about speeding through photos.
Speaking of not having enough time, any less than an hour isn't enough for a portrait session; an hour-and-a-half is closer to ideal because you'll look more relaxed in your pictures (and those first few never come out as well as you hope). Squeezing photos into the first half-hour of your cocktail hour will make you anything but at ease. If you refuse to see your groom before the ceremony, take pictures separately beforehand so the only shots left to take after the ceremony include both of you.
10. Avoid "hiring" a friend instead of a pro.
Sure, your pal was the king of the mix CD back in the day, but that doesn't mean he'll make a great wedding DJ. Same goes for your friend who won't leave home without her Flip — this doesn't make her a videographer! Even on a tight budget, you're much better off paying a vendor with experience to take care of the biggies, like the music and the food. Don't you want your friends to enjoy your wedding instead of having to work through it, anyway? {Amen! Every professional has to start somewhere, but your big day isn't the place. You hire a professional not only for their talent, but for their knowledge and that just isn't something a vendor comes with a lot of when they're starting out.}
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